Beard of Celibacy

"You're shooting epsilons out of your butt!!"
--Krys

When will you celebrate Christmas?

No really, these titles do make sense. There are definitely stories behind these. I'll tell you when you're older. Basically for those of you who only know me through the blog this post is to let you know that all is good. I don't get out much but don't you worry, you all know why.

Things to do:

figure out school options and why the bayou is treating me the way it is
move into a new place
look into new employment opportunities
grow my beard of celibacy until mid-May then mid-June
go to St. Louis, MO
go home to LG, Ore.
love life

Idea Man

"I just bit your finger of love......awkward!"
--Teenie

Not always a genius



I think I've finally discovered it. I'm an idea man. I work so much better with ideas and theories than anything else really. I am excellent at creating all kinds of elaborate plans [granted, mostly about girls] and they're all amazing. However, when it comes to practice, my plans never work as well as I hype them up to be. You can ask a lot of people I know, I've had quite a few ideas. There are these date ideas, "get to know you" ideas, this girl totally wanting my bacon forever ideas and so forth. You get the idea. Then we get into how I am going to bring these ideas to pass. Turns out most of these should never happen. Because when they do happen, people freak out, other things that I did not plan happen, everyone feels awkward and then we all recluse doing other things. Weird....

I've realized that my ideas have had their consequences as does everyone else's. Not all ideas are bad. Not all are good either. Good or bad, either one will work depending who you are idea-ing about. Some ideas have been proven to work for many people. One such idea is [as it was put last night and hence will become a favorite phrase] whoring out cookies. There are a lot of guys who like baked products and girls will provide [don't ask me why I like this sentence]. So basically, ideas can lead you places that you may or may not want to go in the end. These ideas could lead you to a Manatee Thriller Make-out or maybe the near complete destruction of your soul. Heck, some ideas have gotten peoples married. None of this has worked for me very long so far.

Also, I often times I come up with ideas due to conversations that I've had with people. Other times, people will just tell me what I should do [hint, hint, Eileen!]. My ideas will vary upon who I am in most contact with, how I'm feeling, your mom, etc. Then I'll get on these kicks and there's no stopping me. Yeah, it's weird. These kicks will lead me to a lot of thinking. Many times I just play around with the idea and do nothing. But there are times when I've done something i.e. a letter to Sandra D., an art project, a dress up date, trips out of the state [I can guarantee pretty much at least one more] and the likes. I actually think, that I don't do anything anymore with at least one or two ulterior motives. So, I guess buyer beware. Anyways...

C:\>Good_Luck.exe_

Definition

"You look less stoned than you did yesterday."
--Sarah

Linguistically

Phonetics and Phonology. Understanding how, when and why sounds are made and understood in a language really. Rules are developed and followed. Rules are played with and changed. Definitions and concepts of rules are pondered. Explanations are made. Somehow, individually, thinking, impossible, eh? One thing I've learned:

minimal pair
–noun Linguistics.
a pair of words, as pin and bin, or bet and bed, differing only by one sound in the same position in each word, esp. when such a pair is taken as evidence for the existence of a phonemic contrast between the two sounds.

[Origin: 2006]

Truly speaking, the troubles are found in timing and placement. I want to do case studies but I do not know the plausibilities of how to do such.

C:\>Good_Luck.exe

Dear Santa Clause

"That would be the easiest Christmas present ever!"
--Nicole

My Worldly Christmas List

As the years have gone by, my Christmas wish list has certainly been revamped. I find that there's not a whole lot that I really want. This is pretty much what I got: I need to find a subtle way to tell my parents that I want a printer/scanner/copier shin dig for my computer. I could certainly make use of that [Unlike Flippin who said "Screw the printer!"]. I also wouldn't mind a split payment to help purchase the entire Calvin and Hobbes Collection thing. If you didn't know already, the Calvin and Hobbes is my favorite comic ever. So, that would one of greatest things ever. I could always go for some more DVD's. I don't have an exact list of movies that I want, so you can surprise me.

On other thing I want would be to get out of town. At least for a day or two this season. I have one good idea. That would be my Christmas present to myself. I'd be really okay with that.

And....

This Holiday Season

"Well, what if there is no tomorrow? There wasn't one today!"
--Phil Conners, Groundhog Day

reminds me that January is coming

Yesterday I looked outside and saw that Utah Valley was in the midst of a snow storm. Immediately I got depressed. I am not a fan of winter. Everything becomes cold, dark and grey. November and December have always been decent to me but nowadays serve as a reminder. A reminder that January is soon to be here. January is waiting for me. Waiting to take every part of my life and make it miserable. It has for pretty much the last five years. Especially years three and five where I was left bitter, mean, nearly soul-less and without previous friends. Every year it's been starting earlier my fears. And Christmas break is always the calm before the storm. Christmas is the time where all my current fears find me and take me over. This usually leads to some sort of explosion in early/mid January where all I fear comes true.

As of right now I'm considering a few things. Like, whether if I want dig myself into a hole and a repeat. Or if I'm actually digging said hole if it exists. Do/Should I take that shovel? Will it be more like a spade? Can I enjoy myself? Will I be myself? Winter has something against me.

This needs to stop. Now.

Not my game

"You have to have the hashbrowns if you want your cash back over easy."
--Amber M.

And I will play it

I just discovered this: People have always played my game. When I say people, I mean girls. It has always been my game. I haven't really played anything else. Nor have I really tried I think. And that is where I have problems I do believe. One game cannot be played by both. If either game trumps the other, there is no solid foundation in which things can be kept alive. Maybe both games have to converge and be edited so that lifelong play can be achieved.

Come to think of it, my game is really scary. It might be the mystery involved. Maybe the mystery is what makes it intriguing. But the unknown is rather difficult to face. And that I think is what I want to do. And I think that is also what I need to do. Do I know how to work anothers' game? Probably not. But as I am interested, I'm going to darn well try. I haven't before, so I need to start.

I've been saying that I need change so now is a good time to get things going. I have a few ideas up my sleeve. They will get used. Now is the time. Am I freaking out? Of course! Scared out of my mind? Absolutely! Am I willing to risk 100%. Heck yes! So, we'll see what happens.

C:\>Good_Luck.exe_

Matrix

"It looks like you're going to walk into a gay bar."
--DT

The red pill or the blue pill

This is my system. I have yet to get away from it. Not that I don't like it when it works. And yet somehow, it showed up again and I was really okay with it.

So I just let things happen. I'm good at that. Then I rediscovered that I do need to make things happen. Okay, so I'm kind of retracting and/or restating some parts of my last post here. Because I pushed my luck. Now I realize that one should make things happen. The whole give and take thing. I'm still working on this. Gotta let some things happen while making other things come to pass.

As for my soul. It is safe and sound in the Moleskine. I cannot express what having my soul back means. Ever since I got it back, good things have happened. I'm okay with this. Please take luck.

Welcome to my world

"I dunno, I've always found your version and my version of hot girls to be different."
--Krista

It also includes a lot of mumbling

Had a very good chat with my very good friend. There was connection. What happens to us is never really expected. Things just kind of happen. Especially with relationships. I myself, am someone who just lets things happen. In my opinion, there's really not much else you can do. Kind of. -ish. well... You know the whole act, react thing, yeah.

This is how I work: I make the best of what's given me. Hence, I just let things run their course. Other people try to make things happen. But I think that really doesn't do as much as many thinks it does. You make things happen which may or may not lead to other things happening of which you have to let happen. There is always something else that leads another thing which has to be dealt with. Then with that, you do other things thinking they're leading this way but they're really not. Then something else happens and you're like 'What the crap?'. And sometimes we give up on some of these and something else appears, while elsewhere disappears while project C reappears. Follow?

Mom and Dad, how did you make it work? I think I'll just let things run their course if you don't mind.

C:\>Good_Luck.exe_

The Ghost of Meals Past

"Failure is unimportant. It takes courage to make a fool of yourself."
--Charlie Chaplin

Revenge? Back with a vengence? Well beaten path indeed.

I did a bad thing. Went and read a few posts of a certain blogspot last night. I don't know why really. I think I was looking for pain. I was also curious as I often am. Then I realized a few things. Last of which was the realization that I should have written down the previous realizings in the Moleskine before drifting off to weary slumber. And believe you me, it was weary.

Along this note, though I've known this for a while: Revenge. Having been played like "Kid" Gleason, manager of the 1919 Chicago White Sox. Thorough and utter destruction. Give nothing. Find the moment to cause the most pain in public. Let everyone know what you did. This I will never do. Probably for good reason. This is what I will do; nothing that will cause this person to hate me. They can not, will not have a reason. That's all I got.

Next on the list the fact I'm on my on doing things the conventional way when it comes to socialism. I may do it like everyone else who is doing it. Meaning, those who are doing it, though not many because most of us are nobks, I'm going to be like them. My presence will be known. I'm meeting the new peoples and talking and all that jazz. None of this comfort zone crap. I am out to cause a ruckus. My plan is to be myself. I am at my best when I am myself. I didn't move to the place I'm at now to hang out with old friends. Nothing against old friends; I'm out to let more people know who I am. I am Felipe!

Title anti-IX

"Felipe, do clear hangers now, or I will run you over with my car!!"
--Note from Sarah C. at work, written with love

I haven't said anything yet

probably want to read the first three paragraphs on this one. This dealt with some happenstances which lead to what I now call Title anti-IX that states:

"If at any time certain privileges are revoked by one Felipe T. O. Sanchez by conviction, warrent or probable cause, a person may not regain said privileges unless otherwise noted by the following clauses;

"1: a- Said revoked privilege may be temporarily granted if a situation is proven to be a situation of emergency or need/comfort.
b- This temporary pass is limited due to circumstance and is avoided at all costs.
c- Necessity dictates pass and is only given on rare occasions.
d- Pass is granted only for minimum time. Anything that is not necessity is not allowed and hence, pass is not granted.

"2: a- If permission is asked, a temporary pass may be granted if deemed a worthy cause.
b- If asked permission is granted, it is because F. Sanchez believes in mercy. Note that permission is very, very limited.

"3: a- Privilege may be regained on an overall basis over a non-specified period of time. Pass is granted after several trial periods of temporary passes and also strict abidement of laws given by and pertaining to F. Sanchez. Consent is to be respected and not trifled with.
b- If at all unsure of current status of pass of said revoked privilege, confer with F. Sanchez for details. Be warned of ambiguity with full load of honesty. Details are generally not spoken and hence F. Sanchez will do his best to form said details in spoken word.

"4: a- If a privilege has ever been revoked, don't push your luck. Refer to adendum 3 please."

Amendment under consideration: "Permanent pass of regained privilege to be in form of written consent on green card that includes terms and conditions discussed by felon and F. Sanchez and signed by both parties."

It is understood that all have their own laws and that everyone is entitled to the protection of their own entity and identity. This is about crossing lines, doing time and proving change. I have been revoked of privileges. I am probably doing time. I am hoping to change.

Wouldn't you like to know

"Aldo's a treasure trove of linguistic anomalies."
--Dr. Poole, Oscar

A treasure trove indeed



1. http://sanchitos.blogspot.com/2006/01/one-step-forward-making-two-steps-back.html

2. http://sanchitos.blogspot.com/2006/02/i-won-pre-owned-footwear-and-two.html

3. http://sanchitos.blogspot.com/2006/04/this-day-of-fools.html

4. http://sanchitos.blogspot.com/2006/04/this-is-all-kinds-of-fuzzy.html

5. http://sanchitos.blogspot.com/2006/05/ground-control-to-major-tom.html

6. http://sanchitos.blogspot.com/2006/07/cosmic-weirdities.html

You remember these don't you. Those horrible little ambiguous posts that tell the entirety of my thoughts without telling you anything. Amazingly enough there were only six of them. Only six. These do actually represent some messed up times in my life as of late. And I also realize that my thought process can be something else. Most of what I think, should probably never be done. But they are experiences that have developed my inner-workings.

So this is what I did: I went through them all and wrote down what names went where in the Moleskine. And let me tell you, it was quite the experience. I did fairly well at remembering people and under what letter was their identity. It is quite interesting to to see what people I was thinking about and what part they were playing in said life. Now there are about two or so letters for which I can't remember exactly who they were and that does sadden me. There are also a few letters that don't have names because they were unimportant and don't really need to be remembered anyway [i.e. persons E, F and H is no. 2]. Some of the letters are reoccurring like unto Man H who appears in 4 and 6 who happens to be Heavenly Father himsef. So you can guess what activity P could be. You will not know the question though. That's very personal. I relearned a lot here. It was quite fun.

Doing this was certainly a good experience. I did have to make some phone calls to fill in some blanks. This lead to some fun conversations. So I thank all of you people who have helped me develop my ideas and forms of posts. I have yet to decide how ambiguous I want to be on this blog. I'm sure I'll have my moments. And this last Moleskine is becoming quite juicy. My posterity will read it someday. And they're going to think I'm messed up. Good for them. Have a nice day all you all.

The fact that I enjoy the fact that I don't enjoy swimming

"So when are you going to get rid of your face?"
--Michelle W.

It's true, and I'm bi-polar

This idea kind of developed last summer. Well, -ish. Next round I might quote said 3rd Moleskine about the whole ice-skating thing. But his here is how it goes now: I don't swim. Can, but would rather not. Not really good at it either. Not that I care any. It's been almost, if not already, three years since I've done any swimming. Just don't care to. And I'm really okay with that fact.

Several friends of mine [one in particular] will oft times go to some apartment complex [The Glenetentary to which Matt is moving to, dork] and hit up the pool up there. They play a game that involves throwing a ball around and bullying each other up. A very active piece of work if you enjoy doing such things in water. I am clearly a land animal.

Now, that "one in particular" friend goes along to said water activities almost always. She can be convinced not to, but right now that doesn't fly with me. I let her go. This allows me to give me some time away from the situation. A situation that I haven't deemed good or bad yet. But it's a situation nonetheless. Quite. Time away from the situation allows me to invest my thoughts on other moot points.

This situation could go in several of two or three directions in one very large recipe. This is where I'm bi-polar. I am sometimes really okay with the idea of the situation. For certain reasons I could go along. For other reasons I could certainly back away. Flippin' told me about "MF". And my thought process is now something else. I'm trying to look at things other peoples point of view, my point of view, considering if I smoke drugs and whatnot. Then there's that thing called a conscious. We also have the tattered remnants of my soul. It's in much better condition that what it used to be. I consider a lot of things. My soul, other peoples' souls, socialism [the interactions of people in a social setting]. whether or not I want to be said "MF". I think I need to worry about other things first. However I am still curious about certain elements with people I know. Eh... In the end all will be well. Be good!

To keep a secret

"I know it's not a party but it happens every night"
--This Place is a Prison, The Postal Service

One must hurt the secret

I discovered that I'm human. Sadly enough, I am. I thought I had taken a stand. Depends on who you talk to. Depends on what about. What do you want me to do? And these are my steps to success:

Step 1: Throw caution to the wind
Step 2: FREAK OUT!!
Step 3: PBBPPPTHH!!!
Step 4: I don't know
Step 5: Freak out again

I think I need to read Moleskine #2 sometime soon.

C:\>Good luck_

Cosmic Weirdities

"I heard a police man say 'Just another overdose.' 'JUST ANOTHER OVERDOSE!!!'"
--Heroine Girl, Everclear

Here we go again....CRAP!!!!....."$%&*%&$"

Persons R and E. Time slots J and N. No time slot D. Feeling A in the air. Activity M elsewhere. Secret Q. Going out of mind Y. Need to pray to Man H. Listened to song 1 of album P by band W. Okay, so persons R and E returned from time slots J and N respectively. I don't know if I can handle secret Q. Oh, and person S will have my head!! I will have my head!! Then there's also persons C and K who, well, no longer really worried about. What are we thinking? What are we doing? I'm keeping my mouth shut.

I don't want to be human

"I'm spread, so thin, I don't know who I am."
--Tired of Sex, Weezer

You knew better



First off, I'm guilty of the same. But, can I ask this question: Have you ever believed in something so much that you would do anything to make it true? I think I have. However in the answer to that question, one can't do it alone. One needs to the "okay" to continue forth with that dream in certain cases. I also have to ask the following: How do we not trifle with other peoples dreams? This is not an easy road to walk.

Now I'm not saying that I'm perfect. I certainly have my faults and weaknesses. Believe you me. I only ask that my faults or weaknesses not be exploited. I know we're human. But I don't want to be human, nor do I want other people to be human. I guess we should all be robots. But I think I'm asking too much right there. Yeah, I am.

Now, I'm not as bitter or as angry as I sound here. I'm just trying to get things straight here. I'm certainly entitled to my own opinion as is everyone else. If you get the brunt of it, I'm sorry. But thanks for listening.

Thanks for all the fish

To those still worry about my soul, thank you so much. To Cami, Callie, Sharalyn and Mandy who never let me down. To Ruth for "loving up" my Moleskine and for those conversations about things we should never do to other people. To Krista and LJ for being some of the most loving and funny peoples ever. To Kersina for the conversation very early this morning for me and mid-afternoon for you and sorry about the German [the jibblies ensue]. To Katherine for accepting that hubcap. To Sandra D. for unwittingly setting me straight. To Amy, for everything. To Amy, for landing me some great advice and incredible drawings. To Aimee for saturday morning cartoons, the up and coming Carmen San Diego and many other joyous ideas done together. To Amy for the fireworks and much more. To Mom and Dad [temporal and Heavenly], I wouldn't be here without you. Thank you.

this is all kinds of fuzzy

"It's nice to have someone to cuddle."
--Mom, you are amazing

Song of the day is "It's all Coming Back to Me Now" by Celine Dion

Person R was Person M last time around and I think will continue henceforth to be person R. I compared person E to person R during that time. But even during concept Q with person E I knew that potential T could not be reached. I also have idea B about R but freaked out of mind Z because of time slot J. Time slot D jacked has jacked me twice and hence I fear time slot J. I wonder a lot of things. Details like D and F and working out problem G. I wonder. Once I asked man H during activity P and got answer Y. I wonder, fear, doubt and hope. Hope.

Felipe...

"Aren't Asians all the same?"
--Prof. Gaskill said to an asian

...It's time to die!!!



Well, it's been done. The details are ineffable so don't ask. Please.

Pirate stuff

On other stuff, I think the picture above is one of the coolest pictures ever. Don't we all need pictures of highly bizarre pirates? I thought so. I got a few more. Just as cool and probably a lot less freaky.

One thing I hope for is a new t-shirt. My old grade school was the Riveria Raiders. And the shirt was green with a pirate/raider on it. One of the coolest things ever. So, I emailed a principal that I know real well and asked if he could find one for me. We'll see what happens. That's about it.

This day of fools...

"Satan's fairly attractive and he's going to stab you in the butt now with a pitchfork."
--Prof. Gaskill

Guess who?

This is how it goes: Person E. Just this week person S "yelled" at me for not doing activity L with person E. However, I know of persons C, H and probably R, T, and F are certainly okay with that. And we all know roommate K is all over this. Also, we have to mention that concept Q is still relatively unknown. Right now I am more than okay with that. I even think that person M is not even aware of concept Q. However, the way things are going, I'm going to receive well more than an earful from probably persons A, S, C, H, R, T and most of ward B. And I won't blame them. I'll deserve it. But, this time around, some souls are going to be destroyed. And no one will like it. Not even me. And for your information, I still haven't done activity L sind Dec. J.

I feel nothing

That's pretty much it. I feel nothing. I should at least feel something, right? With what I am facing, it's not a pretty sight for anyone in a like situation. Because for the most part, you feel something. In January, I was going through something similar. During that time I felt pain, but at least I felt something! I've put myself in quite the jam. Ah, crap!

C:\>Good luck everyone_

I won pre-owned footwear and two bodies

"Way to go boys, you're playing yesterdays tape."
--Phil Conners, Groundhogs Day

I gave birth to a tennis ball

First of all, I would like to apologize to those people who had to repeat yesterday several hundred thousand times just to make it to today. Hope you all got it taken care of. The there was that blinking green light driving down University Pkwy. I think it was trying to tell me that I should give the bayou some respect. I drove by and completely disregarded it for your information. That's what I thought!

Then there was that time where we had a Happy Pirate show that stayed on schedule. Spared no expense making fun of the first half host one Dr. Jones. That was fun. I think every word for Spelling Bee was made up. Acronyms were created and Vladimir has probably already taken over Utah county and Michigan. 'Bout time. And I am Sheryl Crows favorite mistake.

As a second time host to a show and a forever time amateur of the improv comedy, one is bound to learn something. Of course it took Dr. Jones and I about a year and a half to learn that one something. We did some experimenting. We discovered that we only lost a small percentage of audience this time around. I'm actually getting the hang of some of this stuff. At least I'm learning something. Another valuable lesson: some of us should never impersonate JHVO. In fact, most of us won't be able to do him justice. "Bing!!"

ranting and listening to I sleep in sacks of mint

I was talking to S who can longer stand her roommates A-D. I was also told how S went on horrible date E who had to pick up brother F on said date with friend G with potential beau H. I then discovered I haven't really done activity L since Dec. J but that's okay since having talked to man K about subjects P and Q but I still want to see persons A, M, N and now I think person O is out of her gord. Then I did have a good small talk with friend R and her friend T who's not caught up on subject U. I'm weirded out.

final thought: A tribute to the man who has saved my life many a time and has made the Happy Pirates rich in racial goodness. Ah yeah!!

ingredients to hairspray

"Hello legs!!"
--Mr. Knox, Batman

snotnose and mouth [the letters]

So that's what we called ourselves. Not always, but for the most part. But there is an envelope or two where the names are Snotnose and Mouth. I was also called ugly, farthead, Phil-y cheese sandwich, Hotstuff, cutie and a few others. Her name was Jami. We never met but we corresponded a lot. Through letters. Back when they cost just 33 cents a stamp. Those were good days. Ex:



I re-found her letters in my box of uncommon goodies a couple of nights ago. Ah, good times. We were pen pals back in the day. Two high school seniors just doing our own thing. She had met my sister and wrote me a letter. The first letter was much like this:

Dear Felipe,

Um... well, I know your sister and she told me to write. I tell you some about myself and whatnot. Smile big and feel free to write back.

Jami

I wrote back probably saying something to the effect of You know what? I'm cool with that. And thus followed a wonderful year pen-palmanship. We wrote about anything. Everything! Hating the school play, choir director and being the third or maybe fifth wheel. Loving Groundhog's Day, St. Patrick's Day and nearing graduated life. We also gave each other ingredients to hairspray and other non-un-anti-edible items. We had some of the best conversations ever!! She was freaking hilarious!! She even stated, "from the girl who gets to see the best side of you everyday." Making reference to the picture that she sent me that I stuck in my wallet. Is that voodoo? Oh well, I enjoyed it.

We didn't have to write about anything in particular. Just whatever we wanted. We liked each other. We enjoyed every letter. She was the best thing my senior year of high school.