29 November 2006

This Holiday Season

"Well, what if there is no tomorrow? There wasn't one today!"
--Phil Conners, Groundhog Day


reminds me that January is coming

Yesterday I looked outside and saw that Utah Valley was in the midst of a snow storm. Immediately I got depressed. I am not a fan of winter. Everything becomes cold, dark and grey. November and December have always been decent to me but nowadays serve as a reminder. A reminder that January is soon to be here. January is waiting for me. Waiting to take every part of my life and make it miserable. It has for pretty much the last five years. Especially years three and five where I was left bitter, mean, nearly soul-less and without previous friends. Every year it's been starting earlier my fears. And Christmas break is always the calm before the storm. Christmas is the time where all my current fears find me and take me over. This usually leads to some sort of explosion in early/mid January where all I fear comes true.

As of right now I'm considering a few things. Like, whether if I want dig myself into a hole and a repeat. Or if I'm actually digging said hole if it exists. Do/Should I take that shovel? Will it be more like a spade? Can I enjoy myself? Will I be myself? Winter has something against me.

This needs to stop. Now.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I propose we light large bonfires (being roughly the size of Rhode Island) throughout the state and refuse to let Winter come. If Nature won't heat the state, we can do it ourselves. Who's with me?

kersina said...

i guess i won't complain about the sunny, yet chilly days that we've been having. have you experienced the cold up in idaho? that stuff freezes your snot. so cold.

Anonymous said...

I have experienced it. Cold = bad. Therefore, there is worse, but that doesn't make here any less bad.

Anonymous said...

I'm a fan of winter, but by no means am I against setting a fire to keep it warm.

Me and fire go together like Bonnie and Clyde.