31 December 2005

Mom wins


"Peace begins with a smile."
--Mother Teresa

First off, on this eve of the new year I want to remind everybody that they should stay off the sauce and on a calender there was a "holiday" called Chanukah. Just letting you know.

Okay, Mom just barely finished my last Christmas present and it just happens to be of me and my brother dressed up as the Super Mario Bros. I'm Luigi and he's Mario and we're rad!! You know how it goes.

29 December 2005

Florence

Police Chief: You know that woman that confessed to the murder?
Tony Giardino: What about her?
Police Chief: It just so happens that she confessed to some other murders.
Tony Giardino: I thought she would.
Police Chief: She confessed to the murders of Abraham Lincoln, Julius Caesar, and Warren G. Harding. She's a nutcase!

I have this neighbor. Her name is Florence. Nice old lady. Probably about 2 billion years old. But the thing is, she's a nutcase. Drives everyone insane. Story times:

1. She yells my name, "FLIPPY!!" There's no use in correcting her. She thinks she has it down pat. Plus, she only has two volumes: silence and double Brando.

2. Tells my mom that she's tired of sandwiches for dinner and will cook her own dinner. This'll happen everynow and again due to the fact that most days of the week other people cook for her. When mom gets busy that generally means small easy meals like sandwiches.

3. Claimed that the Sprengers were due back on Monday or Tuesday when we were clearly informed from the Sprengers themselves that they were coming back on Wednesday. Oh, she knows...really she does. She says so.

4. I've never seen her anywhere else besides that chair in her living room.

5. The Johns have said that Florence is out of her freaking gord. The stories they tell and how they go off on said subject. I actually find it quite humorous sometimes.

I guess the only way to experience what is Florence is to visit her yourself. When I get old I plan on going crazy, but wow. I only hope not to lose my mind so much, just slightly.

26 December 2005

chemical reaction goodness in one's mouth

"And the toothpaste was swirled with tolerance and love."
--Jim Meaders

One week. I should be able to make it one week here. The place isn't so bad as long as I have something to do. Besides that, I need to check the place out. Things have changed. New stoplights in roads, others moved, land getting cleared for subdivisions, Wal-Mart getting doubled, no more Shop-n-Kart and I still need to blog about Florence.

Also, while coming home from Safeway [so much cooler than Smith's] there happens to be basically a herd of deer walking down 4th Street. Erwin, what's the plural for deer? Plus, there was me doing a whole lot of absolutely nothing throughout the day. That'll happen. Ooh, and I had pumpkin pie for breakfast! I'm all over that.

Anyways, people are missed. Matsugi, Benja, Dr. Jones, Whitebread, Uffish and bunch of others. You know who you are. And to finish off, quotes from the REal Ghostbusters:

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Man: I'd like to welcome you to the studio.
Ray Stantz: Wow! This is really fantastic! It looks just like the real thing!
Man: That's why we wanted you here to advise us, make sure we're doing it right. After-all, this is your life story..
Peter Venkman (I): No problem. As long as you got the right people to play us. Admit it, Redford was dying to play me, right?
Man: Not exactly. Here's the cast list.
Winston Zeddemore (I): Murray, Aykroyd and Ramis? What's that - a law firm?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Peter Venkman (I): Egon, remember what I said. If you're gonna stay on this planet, you have to speak our language.
[the Ghostbusters are on the demon Dib Deblin's game show]
Winston Zeddemore (I): I sold my soul to the devil. I sold my soul to the devil.
Egon Spengler: Actually, Winston, Dib Devlin is only a minor demon.
Winston Zeddemore (I): I sold my soul to a minor demon. I sold my soul to a minor demon.

25 December 2005

church conversation

"There's the ex-girl that you used to like and she's working on her third kid."
--Mother

This is part of a conversation that I had with one Dr. Pettit right after church services just after a young girl passed by:

Me: "Was that Elyse Meyer?"

Dr: "Yup"

Me: "Married?"

Dr: "Yup"

Me" "Kid?"

Dr: "Yup"

I get back and things have changed. I get caught up on what's going on and like stuff. Yeah, this is weird. Washington was nice.

20 December 2005

This is home?

"What would you do with a brain if you had one?"
--Dorothy, The Wizard of Oz

"All I want for Christmas are my two front teeth!"
--Alvin and the Chipmunks

As I tap my heels together and say, "There's no place like home," I realize, yup, there isn't any place like it. Right now, it's more of a frozen wasteland than Provo. The weather is rather horrendous as it usual is for about 7 months of the year [Oct. to Apr. you can count on being mostly bad, the rest is normal funkiness]. The drive was something else. But I'm here and I may as well enjoy it.

Home, Mom and Dad are busy working. Little sister doing her own thing which often includes her trying to pick at my brain somehow. There's very little family to what I'm used to. That's sad. I generally have about 50 gwazillion peoples around. I work around it though. The house is cold, probably just below 70ºFahrenheitt [Matsugi, you would probably resort to several huge blankets for the entire day]. Mom and Dad are great cooks but dinner has consisted of microwaving leftovers so far. Having saved my laundry for probably longer than a good idea has left me wearing shorts for the entire day as all of my long pants underwent a cleaning cycle.

Sleep is another matter. First, there were the prank calls at 12:30am Monday morning to which I resorted to telling said prankster something like this, I'm traveling tomorrow so if you want me to die, please keep calling. Last night I still felt as if I were in motion because of so long in a car. Tonight is going to be spent in buses and stations. So, I anticipate being wasted for most of the break. But I do believe it will be worth it.

All in all, Christmas is a good time. Many people are missed, most of you know who you are. So, I guess, have a wonderful day.

17 December 2005

Traveling pants? Only in my suitcase.

"Ammonia, it's like shoving a screwdriver up your nose."
--Nathan B.

Ah, the time has come upon us. Finals are certainly over. Since Thursday and thank heavens. Yeah, finals always jacks me and generally in the face. Let's go over them:

bad stuff:

-speeding citation is all messed up. Their records are all screwy. I need to fizx this.
-7:00am final this past Wednesday. Um, that's butt early. Plus, said professor showed up about 20-25 minutes late with some sort of test that "needed" to be taken.
-working at heritage halls custodial. bleh...

good stuff:

-Monday morning I got a call from a secretary saying that I had a new occupation at the bayou bookstore. It's not custodial. So happy.
-10% discount
-no more tests for several weeks
-watching movies like Ghostbusters and the latter half of Waking Ned Divine and many episodes of the A-Team.
-Getting knocked out by Novocaine so that friends can shove me on a plane to go to Mexico
-eating tacos a sink
-conversing with people that I've never met as Krista
-Seeing Dave and Jared. Been slightly over two years since last time.
-Exchanging Jolly Rogers with Matsugi. Probably one of the funniest things ever!
-General snuggle time with Matsugi.

Yeah, it's time for a break. I was getting rather tired of school. And we all know that I don't care for calculus. Then there was that time while walking home from a final and I was talking to some girl [whom I've seen on a couple of occasions] where at the end of the conversation she says "well, see you later Felipe". That's okay I guess, mostly weird though because I distinctly recall not telling her my name. So that leads me to a thought, how many have I never met know my name? Sandra D? So that was odd.

AS for the title, I'm heading home to Oregon come Monday. Hence, I'm getting out of this town. Got myself a riding buddy and his sister who are from good old LG. I'm then heading up to Washington for a couple of days. Good times will be had. Looks like it's the bus for me on the Washington trip. Riding buddy to Portland is a no go due to circumstances. Oh well. I'm putting on lots of miles but I get to see Matsugi [who had left today] but it's all good and get to do lots of stuff. Two weeks out of Provo will do me a lot of good. Not much else to say I guess. Matsugi you are great, best thing since sliced bread. And all of you, travel safe.

This post has been brought to you by Krista's coMpUter.

12 December 2005

Welcome to the Dentist Associations of Hershey's

"My gloves have sneeze on them."--Jules

So we get food in our mouths. That happens. We consume. And consume we do. Now, the thing is that we end up consuming a lot of foodstuffs. I wonder why? With all that foodstuffs, we would include some rather bizarre entities. Yeah, people are weird. But, often times, the foodstuffs will include mass amounts of chocolate. We like this. Yummers!! Okay, with that being said, some of the gunk that is created by our masticating of said foodstuffs gets stuck in all the weird corners of the mouth and teeth. Yes, this is disgustipating. So, there was the creation of toothpaste and what have you. Most of us like clean teeth so there's no problem with the brushing of a few teeth hopefully on a daily basis. It's all good.

But don't we wish there were other ways in which our teeth could get cleaned. Or that toothpaste could be put in any sort of food and our teeth would stay clean as we eat. We love the laziness factor. Imagine this: toothpaste covered brownies!!! Just think of it, you get the wonderful taste of the chocolate with a slight taste of mint on the side that comes along with that whitening action?! Wonder of Wonders, Miracle of Miracles!!!! Or maybe have your steak basted in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle style Crest? Oh, the life!! We should market this!!

09 December 2005

spelling bee

Todos tienen una opinión sobre la música y cual es su tipo más preferible. Para mí, yo creo que la mejor música es la de los ochentas. Más que nada, a mí me gusta el estilo y el ritmo de este tipo rock y pop en ese tiempo. Y voy a explicar por qué ese es mi música favorita.

Primero, los ritmos son originales y tienen un estilo como ningún otro. Canciones como Salte de mis sueños, y entre a mi coche por Billy Ocean y El poder del amor por Huey Lewis and the News tienen su propia forma de ser que no puede encontrar en ningún otro lado. Sus ritmos y palabras son originales y son muy pegadizos. Por eso, a mí me gustan.
Segundo, los mensajes de muchas de estas canciones me hacen sentir feliz. Y este es por qué digo que esta música es el tipo que le hace sentir bien. Cada vez que escucho de música de los ochentas me siento mejor. Siempre me pone en una actitud buena. Creo que este tipo de música es el mejor para hacer que las personas se sienten mejor y se ponen felices.

Con estas cualidades, mi opinión que la música conocida como los ochentas es el tipo mejor del mundo. También creo que todos deben tener un tantito con otros para tener una variedad para que sean felices todo el tiempo.

Translation:

Everyone has an opinión about music and what kind they is their favorite. For me, I relieve that the best kind of music is the music from the 80’s. More than anything, I really like the style and rhythm of pop and rock of the time. I am going to explain why this is my favorite kind of music.

First, the rhythms are original and have a style like no other. Songs like Get out of my dreams, and into my car by Billy Ocean and the power of love by Huey Lewis and the News has its own style that you can’t find anywhere else. Its rhythms and words are original and catchy. Hence, I like it. Second, the messages of many of these songs make me feel happy. And this is why I say that this music is the kind that makes you feel good. Every time the I listen to 80’s music I feel better. It always puts me into a good mood. I relieve that this type of music is the best to make others feel better and happy.

With these qualities, the music known from the 80’s is the best kind in the world in my opinion. Also, I believe the that everyone should have a little along with other kinds of music for variety so that they’re happy all the time.

And this is what the spell check did.

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mongooses losmucosajes Estescchancinesstas Hagenosentry Felix sentESTeexzproYquastdigs qua EST disickuexestatipsqua lea hackisentry beanaceCadytvexbqua.eschewsvez qusickcuchLoseaccents de sinnedhmajor meSimper mejpony SieUNeactuatedeBuenana CreetquabEST.tipeo quesickeexipo majorºpare hacker quaoLasaperson's SEesuntanrmajor seSEiphonon fleeces se ponen Estesechildhoods estaopinelidquas, mi sickiconcedelcomaºLosaaccentsaexomo tipomajoras esMinotipoTampar dCreeuqua.tootsbDevonctenorue ttaintedben todorsuparentenorcUNopartedapareequanSeanrfleecesaToddue stempolices todo el tiempo.

Translation:opineveryone has an opinión about music and what kind they is their favorite. For me, I relieve that the best kind of music is tSe music from the 80’s. More than anything, I really like the style and rhythm of pop and rock of the time. I am going to explain why this is my favorite kind of music.

First, the rhythms are original and have a style like no other. Songs like Get out of my dreams, and into my car by Billy Ocean andhue power of love by Huey Lewis and the News has its own style that you canÂ’t find anywhere else. Its rhythms and words are original and catchy. Hence, I like it. Second, the messages of many of these songs make me feel happy. And this is why I say that this music is the kind that makes you feel good. Every time the I listen to 80Â’s music I feel better. It always puts me into a good mood. I relieve that this type of music is the best to make others feel better and happy.
With these qualities, the music known from the 80Â’s is the best kind in the world in my opinion. Also, I believe the that everyone should have a little along with other kinds of music for variety so that theyÂ’re happy all the time.

06 December 2005

abuelitas católicas latinas and finals

"Qué lo des al hombre."
"Debe ponerlo a donde no se brilla el sol."
"Mi yerno se fue al triángulo Bermudada y se le comió un tiburón."
"Fue culpa mía."
--y muchas otras cosas dijimos benja, whitey y yo

"You pretend to take notes and I'll pretend to teach."
--Prof. Larson

Okay, so it's the end of the semester. Things are crazy. Roommate has 16 pages worth of papers to write. I took a test last Saturday. Last minute assignments are due and about a billion other things. Then we have that joyous week of finals coming within the next few days. Besides that, there are a gwazillion other extra-curricular activities going on. Everybody seems to be putting something on. I mean, something's going on Today, Tomorrow, Thursday, Friday and I believe on Saturday too. Yeah, I'm probably going to die by the end of next week. I think a lot of us feel overloaded. And you know what, I believe we bring that upon ourselves. You're all crazy.

Last nights conversation with benja talking like old crazy latin catholic grandmas was so much fun. We said some weird stuff. Once we got Whitey into it, of course we went overboard. Probably in the Bermuda Triangle. yeah.....

Other than the madness of finals I feel good. Matsugi is no. 1. She gets +10 points. And right now I'm listening to Sheryl Crow.

[
spell check weirdities

ecurricularcular=extra-curricular
ponerlo=funeral
]

01 December 2005

Calculus and stuff

"If ignorance is bliss, this lesson would appear to be a deliberate attempt to deprive me of happiness, the pursuit of which is my unalienable right according to the Declaration of Independence. I therefore assert my patriotic prerogative to not know this material. I'll be out in the playground."
--Calvin

These are my thoughts on calculus. It is a deliberate attempt to destroy my soul. Come on, when was the last time you enjoyed calculus? That's what I thought.

As for other news, the Vanity vs. Acronyms posts are now being published on the 3point5 blogspot because it is a 3.5 current/pasttime. This time around I decided to be mean and use the acronyms of NAAQS and BMX. This oughta be fun.

The semester is winding down and I'm glad it's almost done. Besides hating school and homework I'm enjoying life a lot [I wonder why that is Matsugi?]. Anyways, don't poke me in the eye and get goop all over your finger.

28 November 2005

Butt Freezy Cold Day

"Why can't Asia keep its diseases to itself?"--Brianne Sanchez

7:30 is an early hour. But at that very time roommate Jer was brushing the enamel on his teeth. It was then I decided to poke my head out of my room raptor style with sound and all. There was jumping of feet and flailing of arms. He called me a jerk. I laughed, but it turned me into kind of a jerkface. Not enough of a jerkface though to fear the nine-iron. Ha!!

Watched Tron over the weekend. Tee hee. Great Movie.

On Saturday morning I open the door of my apartment to see the layer of snow that had fallen during the night. I'm not excited about cold weather. It's not fun for me. I looked out and said, "Ah, crap!" Also during this time, there happened to be some sort of snowball fight going on. Some demanded that I join their "fun". This included one throwing two snowballs at me whilst I was still in my doorway. One of said snowballs made it inside the apartment. I threatened to kick him *****************. He might have gotten the message. I don't care. I soon closed the door and locked it before anyone else could manage a decent shot at me. Me and cold haven't been real good friends as of late [okay, past four years]. I stayed inside.

Maybe twenty minutes later I open the door just to see what's going on which was a bad idea. Though the fight had ended, one girl rubbed her icy gloves on my face. That act alone turns you into a class B jerkface. Minus 10 points. Cold, I don't like you.

Peoples are back from break now. I'm thoroughly okay with this. Most important, Matsugi is back. Hooray. Good times indeed. And please don't be a jerkface.

25 November 2005

7100 calories

"They have a party to go to and it's not yours!--Emmy Sanchez

Considering, I think my Thanksgiving turned out rather well. You know seeing people like Grandma Sanchez, Pat & Alicia, Buttergirl and Dubins, Stooph and her girlfriend, Uncle Tony and his mustache and the likes. However, I mostly relaxed and just watch sort of everything and everyone do their own thing. I ended up eating dinner twice which I'm thoroughly okay with that. I listened to Tony play the guitar country western style. I was chastised by Alicia bor not being like Mikey and harassing the girls every spare second I had. You know how it goes.

Other weird stuff: I drew a picture of Tony's eyebrows in the Moleskine. I almost started liking New Age instrumental music [what the Vaccuum Conversation]. Making fun of Chase's word selection and phrasology. And Grandmas monkey pajamas and slippers. Classy.

Matsugi, you are missed. That really goes without saying. So weird not seeing you for a couple of days now. Also, I wish everyone a pleasant weekend with a safe and politically correct drive home. Ha!

22 November 2005

Slow Down Grandma!!

"You'll let me know if anything exciting happens."--Grandma Sorensen

I am a firm believer that grandmas are allowed to say anything they want. You can't stop them, it's impossible!! Plus, they get away with it. However, I think I am able to see the inexplicable logistics of that. That's why I love Grandma. She'll say some pretty whack stuff and it's freaking hilarious. Story time:

Earlier this summer the roommates and I passed through the hometown [Manti, Utah] of my grandparents for a wedding. Of course I had to stop by the old Sorensen abode. There is absolutely no way not to be convinced into listening to at twelve billion stories and going out to the barn to see how far Grandpa is on the plane. Yeah, Grandpa is building a plane. My favorite story that Grandma told was the one about a turkey she raised not too long ago [per say] and that it hated her. It just happened to be the most onery turkey EVER!! They had a few spats, never agreed on anything and the stupid turkey pecked Grandma! Filthy turk!! So what does Grandma decide to do? Cut it's head off and cook it for dinner. I think she described it as the "toughest turkey dinner ever eaten." I think they racked a cumulative total of one billion points from the roommates. Rightfully so.

This past Saturday I went down again to Manti for an Eagle Court of Honor for my cousin, this time with Matsugi. We get to the place and I see and say hi to Uncle Kenny and the likes. We're invited to partake of some dessert type goodness and whilst doing that Grandma sneaks up from behind and jumps me.

Grandma: "Why haven't you given me a hug yet?"

Me: "Well, uh..."

Grandma: "Didn't you even look for us?"

Me: "Yes, I...."

Grandma: "Don't you even love us anymore?"

Me: "Grandma!!"

Yup, that's Grandma. Of course I was forgiven. She then proceeded to to say, "Matsugi, do you want to hear stories about Flops?" Matsugi consented and really, what could I do to stop them? Yeah...I know.

This time in Manti we got to walk around the Grandparents property. Checked out the plane in the barn, the pond in back and even the outhouse. The outhouse was quite impressive. Grandpa and Grandma thoroughly enjoyed a nice little visit. They go off on their stories and everything's all good. We get caught up on all the cousin gossip, listen rants on about lawyers [sorry you had to hear about that one Matsugi] and without fail Grandma says a few things that are completely absurd. One in particular where I think, wow, thanks for that implication. But the trip was much enjoyed and well worth it.

So nice to see some of the fam. Uncle Kenny had a few bad jokes, spoke Japanese to Matsugi and overall had a good time. But what made my night was the receival of Care Bears the Movie. Matsugi, I award you two billion points. You're great! And Grandma, you're really weird.

18 November 2005

Math made my day?

"We've got colored chalk today!"--The Cornwall

So that's what my math TA said at the beginning of class. That's all I got for you.

17 November 2005

The "joys" of work

"It's just trash, but we love it!"--Taylor

Work for the most part is really crappy. It's monotonous, boring, the occasional jerk and the not so uncommon weirdo. However, there are a few perks about the job like unto listening to my boss mispronounce my name, tooth-picking lint traps and talking with some of the peoples which include but not limited to: Jules, Darbs, D-Slice, Kayla, Mary, Tee-Lore and so forth. We always end up talking about how much we hate our jobs, telling Tee-Lore to shove it, him telling me the same in retort, relationships and how boys/girls are dumb in general with the occasional exception [Matsugi, you are the greatest exception ever!!].

I am very well caught up in the lives of Darbs, Jules and D-Slice plus a few others. One's about to take the next step in life, another took a leap of faith, one discovered that the man treats her like every other girl, plus one who is basically official and the other which wants something to happen but apparently, he's got no gumption. We got all kinds of scenarios. It's fun. I input advice where I can if asked. There have been many a good story.

Another perk has been scoring free stuff. [bénxa] has the lawn chair that was scored during summer. Some people have scored CD's, clothes, a movie or two and many other things. I somehow was the one who always found the creepy man posters, granted there were only two and one of which found itself right above Keith's bed. Two days ago, I was having a good chat with the Shanna and D-Slice at which point I flicked my shoe from my foot somewhere in the conversation. Slice then asked me what size shoe I wore and I told him what I wore. Generally a size too large because I'm not a big fan of tying the laces. He then informed me of some shoes in the DI box downstairs. I checked them out. They fit and I was impressed with the style. They're on my feet as of this moment. I was rather pleased with myself.

I try to make the best of everything. Somehow I've managed to there for entirely too long. But the place does have it's good points [however nowhere near as many good points as one Matsugi, I'm sorry, you just can't top her]. I really enjoy my life right now, mostly because of Matsugi but a new pair of shoes was nice.

Sometimes, it doesn't seem like a month. But I'm okay with that.

14 November 2005

The sun is longer a heat source

"I'm gonna take a hot shower thinking of all this ice."--Sanka Coffie, Cool Runnings

So when I walked to school this morning I had some sort of feeling of foreboding because of the freeziness factor. But I go through classes okay. I'm inside mostly and I get done all that needs to. You know how that goes. Then, after my last class is done, I head on over to work. The problem with this is that there was rain and it was cold and then there was hail and freeziness!!! MY POOR LITTLE SENSES [well, two out of the five]!!! I became wet and cold. I'm not happy about this. After work there happens to be snow falling to the ground. The wind is whipping across my face. Thank heavens for the high collar because my neck would have been destroyed. But, snow? Ah, man!! Now come the days of a red nose that no longer functions outside because it's frozen. Gone are the days of rolling down my car window and blasting muzak for everyone to hear. I now have to graft my beanie on top of my head, not that I don't mind so much. Eh....

However, the one good thing that will come out this winter [and I'll make sure of it], when a good snow comes around, I will be building a snow goon in front of someone's apartment window.

09 November 2005

Games, Plays and Relationships

"I like my genders clearly defined."--Matsugi

I had one of the most entertaining conversations with a co-worker yesterday that got me thinking, smiling and spewing out ideas. Let me do what I can.

So she and this guy have the hots for each other. This is good right? Well, it's the stage where they're with each other most nights of the week but no has yet to hold hands or even discuss the fact that they want to hook up with each other. It's pretty obvious that there's interest but neither one knows exactly the thoughts of the other. This has lead to the man asking said girl out on Friday for Saturday already having tickets because of the assumption that they like each other. This is done with him not knowing that he still needs to ask her out before other guys do because really, they haven't started going out yet and he holds no presidence.

Other story: He took her to Homecoming. She did not take him to Preference [though her original plan was to] because he bashed said venerated practice of Preference. She didn't go at all because of the fact that she still likes him. He still needs an excuse to go over to her place and when he does come over with said excuse the two end up flirting and paying attention to no one else. He still needs some other excuse though. She doesn't need one to go to his place. He still can't ask her out straight up sometimes though he explicitly implies that she should come. She didn't reply until he asked her specifically. Stuff like this happens consistently.

As you can see, with so much interest flying around and nothing happening she is going out of her mind. He probably is too somewhat. This happens a lot when the two aren't straight up with each other. Something needs to happen. A DTR, an FYI, something, anything!! There was the suggestion that she should email the boy specifically giving him a time and place for a discussion of their relationship should be. Or possibly even calling the boy up saying "DTR, tonight 8pm at the Brigham Statue." That would blow him out of his mind!! I would give anything to see the look upon his face after that. I asked if I could slap the boy in the face which she mused the idea and chuckled. We threw around several ideas like this. It was good times.

I'm all about being straight up. Things are so much easier. There's still the possibility of pain but it's tolerable, quicker and probably more worth it than you think. I've learned this [probably the hard way]. Thank you Matsugi for being straight up. It's been an excellent month indeed!

07 November 2005

What the crap have I forgotten?

"When you come to the edge of all the light you know and are about to step off into the darkness of the unkown, faith is knowing one of two things will happen: there will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly."
--JHVO 2004

Ah, the written record of one's life can be many things. It can be warm and fuzzy, bitter-sweet, absolute myrth and jollity and sometimes even haunting. We all know why I write. Thanks to Matsugi who came across a moment that I had completely forgotten and thought, that night was total craziness. There are also a few reminders in the moleskine that I had put down for obvious reasons. Hence, I should go back and read those suckers again. But that's a hard task I've discovered. The range of emotions always does a number on me. It's a lot to take in.

I was surprised to see when I went through Matsugi's journal how much we are alike. With the same insecurities, angst, wanting to destroy something, anything. Small little details that define someone. Define who they are and how they got there. There was even one word that stuck out to me because I had said it too. I will respect.

I look back and see how we've changed. I've been very impressed. We as human beings go through a lot of crap. I only hope that I've grown as much. I am so glad that she is so good to me. Looks past many of faults and reminds me to fix things here and there. I cannot ask for more. Thank you.

05 November 2005

Best ECON question ever

"We don't want any of you to disintegrate."--Greta

So when I was taking me Economics test yesterday I stumbles across question 32 which stated thus following:

32. What's the best example of a public good?

A. Parking lot at a mall
B. [I don't recall what B was, no matter]
C. Protection for U.S. Air Space
D. Money
E. A life-size replica of Burt Reynolds

I just about busted up laughing. That made my day up to that point. It was a good end to the time up on campus.

04 November 2005

Only in Dreams

"You can’t resist her.
She’s in your bones.
She is your marrow, and your ride home.

You can’t avoid her.
She’s in the air.
[in the air]
And in between molecules of oxygen and carbon dioxide.

Only in dreams, you’ll see what it means.
Reach out our hands.
Hold on to hers.
But when we wake, it’s all been erased.
And so it seems... only in dreams.

You walk up to her.
Ask her to dance.
She says ’hey baby, I just might take a chance.’

You say it’s a good thing.
That you float in the air.
[in the air.]
Up where there’s no way I will crush
Your pretty toenails into a thousand pieces.

Only in dreams, you’ll see what it means.
Reach out our hands.
Hold on to hers.
But when we wake, it’s all been erased.
And so it seems... only in dreams.

Only in dreams.
Only in dreams.
Only in dreams!
Only in dreams!
Only in dreams!
Only in dreams.

[you gotta love it.]"

Also:

"I've got the Dungeon Master's Guide
I've got a 12-sided die
I've got Kitty Pryde
and Nightcrawler too
Waiting there for me
Yes I do, I do

I've got posters on the wall
My favorite rock group Kiss
I've got Ace Frehley
I've got Peter Criss
Waiting there for me
Yes I do,I do

In the garage I feel safe
No one cares about my ways
In the garage
Where I belong
No one hears me sing this song
In the garage

I've got an electric guitar
I play my stupid songs
I write these stupid words
and I love every one
Waiting there for me
Yes I do, I do

In the garage I feel safe
No one cares about my ways
In the garage
Where I belong
No one hears me sing this song
In the garage"


And:

"We go together baby
And if you do
I’ll be your weakness baby
And get to you

Stream line
Main line
Fall together, get up

Any time you want me baby
I’ll be around
That’s what they teach you baby
To dig my sound

Stream line
Main line
Fall together, get up
Stream line
Main line
Fall together, get up
Yeah, yeah, yeah"


Weezer generally expresses things the way I see them too. These songs are favorites of mine and good examples of me or my thought process. I have my dreams, ideas, ways of doing things. I guess the reason for this post is that I believe in dreams, ideas, doing your own thing, being yourself, letting others be themselves and just trying to make the best of everything. Do what you feel is right. It's all good.

02 November 2005

Bucket o' frozen honey

"There are times when people just want to kill you."
--Intro to IR

I come home one night and find upon the doorstep a small type bucket. Out of curiosity [if I were a cat I'd have gone through so many lives past nine] I took it in and proceeded to open it up. It was frozen honey. First of all I think the smell is rather funk-nasty and the taste is something else. All in all, it is not one of my favorite things

As I saw the honey frozen in said bucket, I thought to myself, who the crap does this? Some of us were thinking there's something in it. We always think that there's some sort of calling card/message or what have you. This meant that we had to melt the honey. This is no easy feat mind you. The melting consisted of me filling the bathtub full of hot water and letting the honey sit in there for the night. By next afternoon the honey is gooey enough with which we could spoon through it. Most of the spooning was done by Jer. Thanks man! Oh yeah, there was nothing in the honey. We then chucked it.

One of the culprits of the honey dropping revealed their identity. She had quite the smile on her face. Doubly so when I told her that we searched it. In the end everything was quite humorous for me. Indeed well done.

This is what I found when I googled "bucket of honey"

01 November 2005

I'm sprouting

"The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance.
The wise grows it under his feet."
--James Oppenheim

Experience:

A couple of weeks ago I'm walking to campus. Off to the side there's that hill type thing and whatnot where I see about four or so youngsters no older than five years of age rolling down said and giggling it up. I watched and enjoyed the splendor of the scene with some sort of massive smile on my face. I pass by the guardians who take notice of my observance and the man says to me "Don't you miss that?"

My reply: "Oh, so much."

The joys of frolicking around wherever possible were endless. Now I have to take care of school, work and pay for things like foodstuffs. My frolicking is much less frequent but the joys are still endless. But I also find joys in many other things now. I've had to learn this, I think it's some sort of skill. It's possible that you could say that I've built character. Like everyone else, I've built character the hard way. In fact, I don't think one can build character the easy way [is there an easy way? Probably not]. Learning unexplainable stuff is no walk in the park. Actually, it's no fun. But at least I grow up and become a little more sturdy. But growing means you probably did something to provoke that. Something very more than likely on the un-kosher side of the line. Or maybe you discover something that you must do or must discontinue doing. All of which are very difficult to deal with. Mostly because we end up beating ourselves up mentally until we're emotional basket-cases. Why does this have to happen? I don't know, but it seems unbearably necessary. I'm learning to deal with it.

Yesterday I found myself thinking on the words of Calvin, "Every time I've built character I've regretted it." The panel came to mind during work and it stuck. Somehow I found me inside that quote. I understood something about myself that just screamed at me. I've done a lot of things these past 24 years. Some good, some creepy and some well...yeah. And the thought came:

"I regret the act but not the consequences."

It was like getting hit with a barrel of bricks. There are a few things that I will never do again but what I've learned because of the consequences I consider invaluable. I realize now that I can't do anything I want. Unless of course I want to destroy my soul but there are a few people around here who want me to keep my soul. Heck, everyone, please keep your souls!! I am sprouting, I am growing up.

Hobbes: Do you think there's a God?
Calvin: Someone's out to get me!

26 October 2005

Another Moleskine entry

"Here's some simple advice: Always
be yourself. Never take yourself
too seriously, and beware of advice
from experts, pigs and members
of parliament."
--Kermit the Frog

Two things on Moleskines today.

1. I've created a wandering Moleskine project to go around with bayou students here. I sent it off today. I'm curious to see how this will go over. This basic premise is thus following: A bayou student finds it, writes down something and leaves it around campus for someone else to find and do the same. Who knows what will happen but I think it's all good.

2. Within the next day or two I will start on a new Moleskine journal. I am finishing off number four. Had some artwork put in thanks to G. And once again I am amazed at the work and styly G does. So this means that I will be going through the usual prologue and epilogue thinking type stuff as I start each new notebook. This has always done me good because I take time to sit back and think things over. I am able to see what I've done, where I'm going, what I've fixed and need to fix. Overall, it's somewhat a resolution period. I try and switch things up a little and what have you. Hence, looking out to the horizon wondering what's in store for me. Life's an adventure and I need a map, a PBJ sandwich and some good friends. And I'm so happy that Matsugi will be there for the ride. Good times are to be had. Thanks all of you.

I wear pants

"There are a lot of things you find in your pants."--Matt

I wear pants and shorts, although rarely at the same time. Then there are those shorts that used to be pants thanks to one swiss army. Also we have the really long shorts you don't want to call high-waters. SPANTS!! Track shorts are filthy short. Yup, we like pants.

Anyway, yesterday I wore some pants that were those fancy zip off/away pants that you can turn into shorts thanks to some weird fashion designer team or person. Yeah, they're comfortable and what have you. Of course they had to be because I bought the size I prefer [which might be slightly on the larger size than I really need]. But the thing is that I really enjoy shorts and hence I will be wearing said pants without the lower half. Now this is the third pair that I've owned. The first pair I lost one of the pant legs so they permanently became shorts. The second pair having worn them as shorts so many times the discoloration became so distinct that you could hardly tell that they belonged. Hence, I threw away the lower half recently. The third pair starting to show color differences may become shorts soon enough unless I want wear said pants that will soon become two completely different colors. What did I expect? This was bound to happen. Not that my style was all that great anyway. But I will try and be as minimally hideous as possible.

Plus, if you so desired, the switching out of the lower half of your pants with some other character who shares the same style of zippity offs we could have quite the fashion collaboration of sorts. I'm not saying that this is a great idea and that we all should do it [got word that Chairman Mao was trying to do this, that's bad]. I'm more than likely saying that this is an idea that should only be done maybe for 15 minutes before requesting the return of the lower half of your pants. You're silly.

All in all, I am wearing pants and they're quite cozy. Hmmmm.....

24 October 2005

Our next opponent is UNICEF!!

"If you did that, I would have to bring about the second coming."--Cami

Once again we went through another acronym on the vanity mirrors. True, this one was a bit more difficult considering it was freaking UNICEF!! And I'm really happy that cleaning checks [which I rocked house!!] came and we had to erase all graffiti. Anyways, this is what we had:

I want to make a donation to UNICEF

Uniformed Navies In Certain Energy Failures
Union of Narcoleptics Inviting Comatose Easy Frogs
Unimpressive Nudists In Carefully Enclosed Forests
Ugly Nerds Intrepidly Cursing Extreme Fractals
Uninsured Nebraskans In Cars Exporting Fuel
Uninterrupted Natives Incubating Chicks Enough Flammable
Ubiquitous Namibians Intercepting Californians Ever Fleeing
United Nocturnal Insects & Creatures Equally Fearsome
Ugandans & Norwegians Icing Crustaceans Endearingly Friendly
Uniform Negative Inversions on Cepstrally Equivalent Forms
Unintentionally Nasty Insursions of Cauliflower-Eating Futons
Unyielding Natural Incinerations by Careless Evil Flames
Usurping Nationalists Intent on Capturing Errol Flynn
Uninterred Necrotic Individuals Convene Every Friday

Some of these are really weird. But it's still fun. And let's keep them minimally disgusting guys. Thanks.

22 October 2005

Mom, please gossip

"Jump back, I wanna kiss myself!!"--James Brown

My mom is good for a lot of things. Cooking, sewing, chewing me out when I mess up, providing shelter when I go home, purchasing suits and toys, loving up the grandkids when they come and like stuff. Of course the list can go on so why don't we take this little moment appreciate the good mothers.

[waiting...] "ooh, oreo cheesecake!" [drooling ensues]

Okay, one other thing that my mom is rather good at is spreading information to all kinds of extended family and then some. Some of that stuff makes my face turn a slight blush color but if I want to spread news, I know who to go to. The only thing I need to do is supply information like possibly, hooking up with some amazing girl. Mom, you're generally all over that. I know that you don't mind me having a girlfriend with how many girls you suggest. We've discussed this before, ahem....

Mom-"How about Ori?"

Me-"She's cool and all, but, eh."

Mom-"Why don't you go out with one of the Westenskow twins!"

Me-"Probably not going to happen."

Mom-"Retard Bedard?"

Me-"I don't see anything happening"

Mom-"What about *******?"

Me-"We would end up destroying each other's souls."

Mom-"What about Ori then?"

Side note; it took Ori getting married for mom to give up on that possibility. This is for you mom: I salute all you Waites!! Especially you Penelope!!

Now that I have a girlfriend [Matsugi, you are GREAT!!], I let you know mom and I have yet hear from immediate or extended family asking more in depth questions. This is odd. I provide the girlfriend and you provide the means of communicating to everyone. Hmm...This needs to get fixed. I'll see what I can do about spreading information but I already know who's good at that. Well, I must do my own thing. Mom, I'm going to give you the go ahead to gossip like nobody's business.

08 October 2005

Mutiny on the port bow!!

"From now on, they'll spell mutiny with my name!"
--Clark Gable, Mutiny on the Bounty

So it's been quite the pirating adventures as of late. I am thoroughly okay with that. Looking through my posts I've realized that I have not mentioned piracy with enough emphasis for my taste. I'm a pirate. Dr. Jones owns the Jolly Roger, I have a special little pirate pouch that can hold a small amount of treasures and I also have a treasure chest displaying the need for looting, pillaging, plundering, ransacking and pilfering and what have you. You get the idea. I don't have a pirate movie yet, but soon enough [Ice Pirates is probably not on the list, but I may or may not be too swarthily tempted to acquire said movie]. So I've done some stuff that has made me very happy. Let us enjoy.

Yesterday, I bought a new Moleskine for a project that I am going to start. Moleskines are sold at the bayou bookstore and they come on these specialized little stands. So I asked an employee if there were any extra stands because they weren't going to use them and I could. So the nice lady looked in back but could find none to that end just grabbed one of the stands on the shelf and handed it to me. I proceeded to give her ten points. I looted a Moleskine stand. Hooray!!

Within the past few days I had noticed an apartment that had a Jolly Roger in their window. Knowing this to be a girls apartment I had this genius idea to give them the "Black Spot" and invite them to watch Muppet Treasure Island. So Ben and I did this today in the afternoon. We actually saw two of the denizens of said apartment just outside their place. They laughed and soon enough, we had said "Ahoy, me hearty" to all. All of us thought it was the coolest thing ever. I'm okay with that.

Now on to the seas!! And nary deal with a ninja mind you. They can't be trusted.

07 October 2005

Vanity vs. BLT

"You're eye-socketing my knee!"--Doctress Jones

Once again, we have a vanity and a dry erase marker and we went nuts!! Thus following has covered nearly all mirror space. Now I can't take a good look at my face to pop zits!! Or something like that. This is what was written:

Anyone want to go get a BLT?

Brontosaurus Love Triangle
Big Likable Tortilla
Bangladeshi Lazer Tag
Ben's Linguistic Talent
Belly-dancing Llama Team
Bellicose Lung Teacher
Badger Loving Tartan
Bionic Louse Tourism
Buried Liver Tissue
Burning Lilac Tree
Bite-size Lycopene Treat
Bebop Listening Trekkies
Blue LeoTards
Beating Live Tadpoles
Belching Like Tajiks
Barbaric Leprous Troopers
Benign Lazer Turtles
Biggest Little Township
[Sparks?]
Boring Legalese Talkers
Burgeoning Language Teachers
[Jer?]
Boron Looting Troglodytes
Blinking Light Terraces
Born Like Tarantulas
Bowling Leprochauns Tournament
Bovine Lushes Treaty
Befriending Laminated Tucans
Beligerant Lyposuction Trainees
Banal Laborious Tasks
Bonnie Lass's Tapshoes
Back-water Lagoon Trout
Brown Lemur Tax
[baddest tax in the whole dang town!]
Brownie Loathing Towheads
Blonde, Lovely Theorizers
Blind Lecherous Twerps
Battle Losing Tasmanians
Banking, Lettuce and Tomato
Bizarre Lioness Treaty
Bilious Lottery Trucker
Burnt Love Tony
[Danza?]
Babies Learning Trigonometry
Bashful Larynx Tickler
Blue Line Tonsils
Brick Laying Tarantula
Beeping Lip Timer
Beckoning Lyposuction Torture
Basilisk Lard Transformer
Best Love Transvestites
[Tim Curry?]
Barking Lifelike Terriers
Bulgarians, Latvians and Turks
[oh my!]
Bleeding Limb Tourniquet
Brazilian Lust Trap
Belly-button Lint Toupée
Bare Lake Tadies
[It's been how many weeks?]
Belch Love Tenderly

04 October 2005

I might need a side-kick

"Put yourself on the list that we'd make cute babies."--Jamie

Your Superhero Profile

Your Superhero Name is The Crimson Dwarf
Your Superpower is Shape Shifter
Your Weakness is Crosses
Your Weapon is Your Magnetic Battle Axe
Your Mode of Transportation is Boat

This brings out my uvular /R/

"My clothing is too restrictive,
could you go over and mix things
up a little."
--LJ Frost

There are many joys in this life. Last night I discovered one of the greatest joys to man, or maybe just me. I did laundry. That's not the exact joy but it is good nonetheless. However, I really enjoy pulling my clothing out of the dryer just after the cycle. So warm [uvular /r/]. That's not the half of it though. The best part of it all was that I just washed my beanie and I pulled it out of ye dryer and I put it on. My head was in pure bliss. I felt very happy.

Then, as I was folding my clothes I found out that my feet were cold at which point I pulled whatever stuff I had yet to fold threw it on the couch and proceeded to stick my feet in it. I savored every second. Nothing warms the soul like a freshly dried set of clothing that's quite warm to the touch still. Now on a cold morning I should just go over to the laundromat with some clean clothes, put them in the dryer and heat them up and then go back to bed piling said warm clothing on top of me. I think that would be the greatest thing ever. Hmmm....I am tempted.

Other great things: Yesterday I saw a man that looked like the young version of Michael Keaton. I had to do a double take. That made me very happy. I saw a good friend of mine yesterday in the Bayou's Testing Center. Of course I had to whisper "I love your face!" to her. I rocked my test today. Got some good food from my dear friends. And as I was looking through my ECON notes today, I saw scribbled on the side thus following: "Pour powder and pretend it's cheese." I have no idea what that means but I like it. I will now wallow in some happiness right now and possibly go to the Wal-Mart.

03 October 2005

Can I enter in peace?

"You guys'll be chalk outlines without me."--Crease, Sneakers

I get home Saturday night. I know all my roommates were gone due to a prior conference meeting. So all is well right? No, no. The ladies in the complex had two hours to break into our apartment, steal the Jolly Roger and place it on the third floor railing, uscrew the light bulbs, place a couch and the chair of shame behind the door and jelly up the doorknob. I am able to get in, cursing mildly of course. I look at the damage, shake my head in disgust and proceed to set everything back to normal. I got everything back in place, took a shower, changed clothing and left within a half an hour. None of my roommates noticed anything and wouldn't have known unless I told them, which I did. I debated not to.

Earlier today I chatted some with a girl who knew who the culprit was. She all kinds of cocky because she knew said information. I told her what happened and she was somewhat disappointed with the results. This made me wish that I did not tell anyone of the roommates about said prank. They wouldn't have known anything and I could have played dumb. That would have pissed off the culprits like none other.

The thing is that I'm tired of the pranks. I don't want to waste my time on these over-elaborate schemes of messing with other peoples stuff. Nor do I want to waste time undoing what others have done to me and my roommies. Piss off and go away!! That's about all I got for you. I now no longer want to know who did it. That's somewhat true. I wouldn't mind giving them the finger. Okay, I'm done letting off steam.

Good stuff: I just got a check for lots of money from the bayou. That makes me very happy that my university is instead giving me money. I am content. And I'm going to Gandolfo's for dinner. Mmm....

26 September 2005

Theory or something

"The knight hath kicked thee in thy face, and when thou has woken up, thine armor was out of style."--[bénxa]

Due to the non-graphical restraints that I put myself under I will try my darndest to describe the associated drawing to the following theory. Ahem....

Picture thus: A road. At the end of said road there is some sort of junction. Two ways in which you can go. You can take path 1 or path 2. Path 1 leads to a place that we'll call outcome A. Path 2 leads us down a very different path that can encompass outcome B or outcome C. All of this will be explained. So, we'll say this:

1->A
2->B or C

As you might have guessed already, this is probably about dating. We're wired this way [The peoples I live with and I]. So let us get going already.

You're on a path, you know, minding your own beeswax and whatnot. Things going along just fine. Then, you see a crossroads of some sorts ahead. You feel that something has to happen or be done. More or less you want something to happen. No ifs ands or buts. You get the idea. You have two options.

1. Take no action*. Things move slow and run their course. Results are highly unpredictable. You can't be sure of anything. Hence, outcome A inevitably taken. Possible crossings of outcomes B or C but not both. Possibilities of losing ones mind is a considerable risk. Actually, it nears 100%.

2. Action is taken**. CAUTION: Possible actions to take are limitless. Results may vary and depending on action, may ensure outcome B or outcome C in their varying levels of intensity.

Outcome B: Actions more likely smooth, subtle. Things go the way hope. Handle experiences as the come. Possible funkiness but all is worked out smoothly.

Outcome C: Actions more likely abrupt, drastic. Probable funkiness at high levels. As are levels of awkward. Lessons are learned. Take life as it comes. Re-evaluate procedures and courses of action.

C:\>Good luck_

*--action not taken unless opportunity arises.
**--opportunity is created and hence, action is taken.

23 September 2005

Oh so very irksome

"How many times do I have to kill you boy?!"--Jafar, Aladdin

So I'm ill. My face feels funky but at least I don't have the symphony. Bowels are still feeling weird though. Okay, that was disgusting, I'm sorry. But the face and the throat and the coughing and either side of the sinus is completely clogged. bleh...Hence, I called in sick and I played hooky with all my classes. I still need to be productive though. We'll see.

So, doing my own thing at the apartment earlier today when the phone rings. It's for me. It's one of those Wells Fargo peoples trying to get me to purchase some insurance stuff. I think somewhere in their I picked up another conversation going on when somehow not too much later I think I was transfered to another representative going on about the same kind of thing but recording me. I'm annoyed by these people. This is basically the fourth or fifth time that they have called soliciting some sort of insurance. I have accepted none. Don't these people get the idea? I just want you to keep track of my money, not anything else. How many times do I have to listen to you people explain the deal and assume that I'm going to purchase your insurance? I heard you well enough. The answer is still no! You should have known that three phone calls ago! Jerkweeds! I dislike phone solicitors. Please make them go away!

So some things just need to die. Ex: whatever infection that's prouncing about in my innards and those stupid phone solicitings. Thanks!

19 September 2005

Ah...the smell of fermentation!

"Palatal-alveolar goodness."--[bénxa]

One of the many non-perks of walking up to campus is thus: stupid plum trees. I mean, somebody should do something about those plums. They're just left there. They get ripe, too ripe and then drop and sit there for quite some time. Enough so that they go bad. Bad enough to where I wouldn't be surprised if they started knocking over liquor stores. I think one of them threw a water bottle at me last fall. That was weird.

Yeah, so this morning walking up to campus I smelled that ever so egregious smell of plum in the process of fermentation. Some days my eyes start doing the twithing thing and my sinuses cease to function for several hours. It's kind of funky. I feel like I can stomp around the mess of fruit, bottle the "juice" and sell it for $1.95 a pint. Of course that would probably destroy my soul.

So the rottingness of anything in my opinion always has some sort of foul stench. Which brings me to some weird thought. Like taste buds, do we also have smell buds? Come to think of it, we probably have something like them but are not in the form of "buds". Maybe they're in the form of "pals"? I'm shutting up.

17 September 2005

As written on the vanity mirror

"The walls in the 53rd precinct are bleeding."--Ghostbusters

Thank heavens for dry erase markers. We write notes to help us remember to acquire certain goods and what have you. Thus following was written on the mirror over the past while:

WE NEED TP

1. Toxicology Pampering
2. Tennis Players
3. tiny pickles
4. Tuba Packering
5. Trail-blazing Peacocks
6. Trim Perpetrators
7. Tourist Police
8. Turbulent Parasites
9. Tripe Popsicles
[they're intestilicious!!]
10. Tandem Parachutes
11. Titanic Pants
12. Trail-blazing poodles
13. Turtle Pouch
["I'll just put that in my turtle pouch"]
14. Traveling Penguins
15. Talkative Portals
[labyrinth?]
16. Terrifying Plankton
17. Translucent Porridge
18. Triumphant Pummelings
19. Terrorist Pizza
20. Telekenetic Pastors
21. Telemarketers Punishment
22. Time Preserves
23. Turbid Pineapple-juice
["Just like mom used to make!"]
24. Toiletry Prowess
25. Tablative Perfection
26. Towdry Pixies
27. Tortugas Perversas
28. Tender Pterodactyls
29. Tsar Psychosis
30. Treacle-flavored Phytoplankton
31. Tepid Pancreas
32. Trembling Polygons
33. Took, peregrine
34. Torturous Pilates
35. Treacherous Parakeets
36. Tangy Pistoliers
37. Typewriter Poop
38. Tater-tot Puke
39. Tyrannical Paraguayans
[Viva Stroessner!!]
40. Temporary Punks
41. Trash-talking Playuhs
42. Traveling Pants
[sisterhood of?]
43. Treacled Postage-stamps
44. Territorial P_______?
45. Tap-Dancing Pipsqueaks
46. Tupperware Pokémon
47. Typecast Pirates

15 September 2005

Shut up Billy Corgan!!

"Give a cadaver an aspirin and see if it feels better."--Prof. Pope

This past weekend was kind of crazy. Most weekends are almost always something else but this one a little more so. So, as you may already know, I happened to lose my Moleskine on Friday. There was some freaking out and what have you. I'm sure that most people would feel rather funky if two months of their life had disappeared. Just so happens that having left contact information in the Moleskine someone had found it and had emailed me. Got that email Saturday night. I was so very happy. I got it back today. Good things do happen.

Story time: So I had dropped my Moleskine sometime during my Political Science 150 [Comparative Governments] class. I didn't notice. During Math 112 is when the discovery was made that I was missing said Moleskine. Once again with the freaking out part. I have my Political Science 170 [Intro to International Relations] in the same room as my PS 150 class. I looked for it some. Not there. Now the thing was, the person who found it, was a PS 170 TA and found it on the podium just after that class had ended. So my Moleskine was in that classroom for about four hours before she picked it up. I am guessing that it went through at least one other persons hands to get to the podium so on. Then I get the email on Saturday night. Monday all is returned. Good deal.

You could say that I am a little more prepared for loss. I'm just trying to take care of myself. Now I just need to take care of a lot of homework. And we all know that homework is no fun at all. Drat!!

11 September 2005

I'm Cheese

"I got distracted by your game winning cracker."--Melanie Tomlison

Who is this man with the can of toxic waste in the middle of the park? How does this person come across any toxic waste at all? Sure, we all know that the stuff affects and does weird things to anything close to its proximity. And I don't think diluting it with water will do us much good. Hence, I got turned into cheese. And if I'm cheese, I think I would probably be pepper jack flavored. hmm....pepper jack.

Wait a second...What the crap am I doing running through toxic waste anyway? No normal human being in his right mind would go skipping through anything not FDA approved. Cool things do not happen when running through toxic waste. None of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle stuff. No DareDevil. My nothing will get enhanced. The Green Goblin and the Joker are both very creepy. I would exactly call those enhancements because both of them are really MESSED.

Also, I am reminded of the Blaster Master story. I'm going off on that sequence of images that runs when you don't press start at the title screen. Why on earth would a normal family have a drum of toxic waste in their backyard right in between their tractor and corn field? Does that seem wrong to anyone besides me? I hope so. And why is there some massive hole by the drum of toxic waste where at the bottom is some sort of titanium vehicle and why didn't I die from that 100 foot fall? This makes no sense to me whatsoever. But that space age suit fits very nicely.

Toxic Waste: Does the body bad!

10 September 2005

Fire-dancer lost

"Standing in front of the mirror to sketch in this strip, I was glad I work in the privacy of my own home."--Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes Tenth Anniversary Book, p. 146

So, over the past year and some, I have gotten into journal writing. I thank my very good friend JHVO for starting me on the habit. The thing that helps incredibly is the small little notebook that I am able to carry around anywhere I go. These notebooks are courtesy of none other than Moleskine [check the link on the sidebar to the left]. I value my 'skines very much. I've been writing in one since 11 July, 2004. About every four months I finish one and start out new. Yesterday however, I lost no. 4. Slipped out of my pocket somewhere between Political Science 150 prior to Calculus. Two months of my life have just disappeared somewhere on campus. Talk about feeling a void. I was wiggin' out.

As worried as I was I have found peace. A couple of things that helped me out. I read an article of the New York Times that lifted my soul. And here's a link to a site that is mentioned in said article. Once again, inspiration can be found in the weirdest of places. Another site.

I know that the Moleskine cannot be replaced. I hope it will be refound in my presence. Having left my name, address and phone number I still have hope it will be returned. Though I can't expect its return. Having dwelled on this for over 12 hours now, I am feeling much better. A half used notebook will find itself in the hands of someone I don't know at all. What's wrong with that? Nothing. My thoughts, experiences, quotes from others and opinions are written down in that thing. Someone will get to know me through that Moleskine. I'm okay with that.

Why do we write? I write to explain me to myself. To help discover who I am. I like to keep track of myself and my thoughts. It's second nature to me now. I write not to keep things hidden. I write to share who I am. These books will eventually go to the people I love. Somehow, I will become real in the imaginations of those people. I might influence them as a friend. We have the ability to reach out to who knows how many people. I write to leave myself behind. I will be imagined as me. I cannot ask for anything else.

To those who write: You will be found.

01 September 2005

I should be 30 ft. to my right

"You opened my cheese wrong!! I'm bitter!"--Summer

Classes started this week. Joy of all joys. I am bursting with excitement. I have quite the class schedule. Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays are beastly. Three classes in one classroom. So, that should become my favorite room because if not, I'm screwed!!

I know campus pretty well. I can find my way just about anywhere. I should be that well versed, I've been here going on three years now. So I'm going to my math class. We all know that there are about 40 gwazillion math classes in that stupid building. I get in and of course it's MATH 112 and/or Calculus 1. All is happy about 10 minutes into the class period I discover I'm in the wrong section. This has never happened to me before. I'm in the right level of math, but not in the correct section. I should be 30 ft. over in the classroom next to me. I decided to stay for the remaining time. Room 104 is basically the same as room 108. Just different TAs and a slightly different homework schedule. Ah well.

Already I hate the math. Good thing I don't have to take anything higher than this. As for math goes. I'm not sure exactly how we are supposed to understand this stuff. I had to buy a new book. And after having done some homework last night I discovered myself writing lame comments in it. I own the book. I can pretty much do whatever. Hence, I will. I still intend on having a good time around here. I have a billion things to do and a zillion homework to do. Got Happy Pirates "try-outs" tonight. I hope to keep some sort of balance. Maybe a scale.

25 August 2005

Man, you really freak me out

"I know you don't mean no harm,
you're just doing your thing,
but man, you really freak me out"
--Freak Me Out, Weezer

This just stemming off a conversation that I had a couple of days ago in mine own kitchen. You know, there are many people out there is this here world and we all have these crazy quirks, ideas, personalities and what have you. Then we end up doing lots of stuff. We do stuff with other peoples and maybe possibly our with ourselves but depending on the mood, we'll do a certain variety of who knows what.

With all of that said and done, we must also realize [this is beginning to sound like some sort of lecture on chemistry, or social behavior or politics...eh...] we come up with ideas and plans that never come to pass. We do not do these ideas because of many reasons. I'll name a few:

a. The stupidity of the idea
b. There's no possible way to even accomplish it
c. We have no backbone
d. The convincing powers of peoples you know
e. Warwick Davis
f. The sheer creepiness of you actually doing it

I myself will only expound on the latter. If you're in the beginnings of the process of the actions and you feel weirded out, creepy, thinking that whoever is going to be on the receiving end of this is going to have their mind blown away; you're probably right. If it seems creepy, more than likely that is the case. You should probably get to know the person before you do anything. Once you know the person, then you're allowed to get away with a lot more stuff. Maybe I shouldn't have said that.

I would like to say now that you should only do things that you are comfortable with but that would get some people into trouble. Once again I would like to say people have their own opinions and good luck to you with the social scene [hint, I've failed several times].

Sometimes I think that creepiness and romanticism share a very thin line. Now there's an argument for you.

23 August 2005

I heart stereotypes

"You're the first person I bought off here."--Brian Cassaday

I'm driving back to my pad from West Jordan thinking about who knows what and lo and behold, I have a thought [amazing isn't it? shut up!!]. I was thinking, stereotypes. Side note: resembles kind of the caste system? just a side note. Basic thing is, we classify people. I don't know why, we just do. I guess it's in our nature. There are definitely certain kinds of people and just subconsciously group them together.

Certainly there are all types of people. We know who knows how many of them. I myself have met upwards of probably several thousand people as have you and that person off to the left. Every single one of them with their own little bit of individualism, personality, gene code and hair color. We get to know them and soon enough we put people into a specific group or folder or something like that.

The jock, skater, rich girl, pretty boy, momma's boy, teacher's pet, socially inept one, village bicycle, Señor Cardgage, creepy guy who writes those letters, fun one, the guy who won't shut up, *wench*, "he smells funny", loud one, obnoxiuos jerk, Tim Curry, "what the crap are you doing?" girl, the opinionated one, Sandra D., the not your regular dude, this person has the IQ of a brick and "why are you making fun of my southern accent?". Just to name a few kinds of groups.

So we get classified. I guess we might have to do it for identification purposes. But we do it nonetheless and we do it a lot. I think we like it. We can't or refuse to do nothing else. We're messed.

18 August 2005

Lithgow, Willis and Boyle

"Do you want to be thumbed down?!"--Aliana Schaeffer

Today is the day where I see a man who looks like unto Peter Boyle. A couple of weeks ago I saw a man that looked like Bruce Willis. Last year I saw a man that really, REALLY looked a lot like John Lithgow. Who are these people? And why don't I know them? They gots to be cool peoples!! I agree with myself.

Now it's not often that one sees persons who look like famous people. I have been told that I look like one Eagle Eye Cherry. Others claim my bro-in-law resembles the loose footed Kevin Bacon. Where do people come up with this stuff? In my personal opinion I don't think I look like said pop star. If that helps you out any, more power to you.

Other notes: Yesterday I ate at our apartment kitchen table. This was the first time in a much too long while. Generally, the table is havoc. Good luck to you.But I must say it was quite the experience. I failed my cleaning check again. I don't care. So far I've never been charged. It wasn't all that bad anyway. I sound disgusting don't I? Ah, crap!!

I must go to witness Abberforth get the hanging of a lifetime. Or the end thereof. I think I might be able to save skin. I have collateral. Yes, I do have your gloves Jules. HA HA!!

11 August 2005

What exactly is the use for a band-aid?

"Go vomit!!"--Absherificon

So, I was checking my electronic mail on campus when I looked off to the side and found this band-aid on the desk. It wrought me into a state of disturbance.

Now don't get me wrong. I do believe that band-aids serve a purpose. When one gets cut and starts to bleed, I would suggest a band-aid, even if you did get cut by a pizza crust [yes, I was stabbed in the arm with a pizza crust and I was cut].

But the question is: does a desk bleed?!?!? Last time I checked. Yes you can cut a desk but it doesn't heal and the only thing that happens is that ones handwriting gets jacked because of the divets created by the cutting. I am also wondering how long the thing has been upon the desk. Left out band-aids are one of the most disgusting things ever. What with the sticky adhesive going funky and the bizarre gross looking brown-ish skin looking color. I get the upwards jibblies. Ehh....

Another messed up thing about this station that I am currently at on campus. I just noticed that the space bar was divided in two. I'm sure my face had that classy "What the crap is this?" look upon it. So out of curiosity, I had to try out both buttons. Yeah, right side is the space bar and the left side is a delete button. I'm weirding out. But I am sitting in a nice chair. Ah...

07 August 2005

Care-a-Lot, We care a lot

"It's cooler out there, warmer in here, I need a tuna sandwich."--Jim

Digging around my closet and/or taking stuff out and putting it all back I happenstanced upon my Care Bear. I've owned that bear since about the mid 1980's when I got it for Christmas one year. My mommy made it. It's totally Funshine Bear. Brings back so many memories. So of course I slept with Funshine Bear next to me. Talk about good times. I mean, he even has the whole heart "tattoo" on the left side of his bummel region. That seems kind of weird to me. Oh well.

Since I've had this bear for probably near 20 years, we've been through a lot together. There's a hole in his armpit and he's also missing his right pupil. But that's okay, he's still got class. I just remember Funshine Bear around me about all the time. And I have him around for sentimental reasons. He makes me happy. I think that's their job. It works.

Does anyone remember the Care Bear movies? I do somewhat. The one about the carnival was kind of creepy. But as I recall, they were still really feel-good movies. I know my parents have them on VHS somewhere at home. That's a massive wall of videos. I should probably dig those up. Well, sweet dreams

05 August 2005

I feel funky

"Go down there in one of those cool little cars and set off a couple of nukes and we'll all have a good time."--Prof. Skinner

I'm exhausted. Two reasons: actual work as a cleaning technician in Heritage Halls and the processing of thoughts throughout the day. Today was full of some unexpectedness with a little bit of what have you scaliwag. The basic premise is that I desire change but do not know what I want. Or something like that...

First off, doors are for going through and windows are for looking through. I'll go through the door. Mostly because I work there. I like being given money, even though I have to work for it. The kids visiting the dorms for the week invited me to go through the window. I ignore them for a reason. Two reasons. They bother me and I clean up after them. So I have eight hours to do my thing at work. I can do the basics within two of those hours. The amount of time we have to do all our duties is ridiculous. No wonder I spend a good portion of my time with some of my fellow custodians. Thanks Auds and Jules. However today, I did some group work [of which I was not crew leader and was very happy] and I had to pass around some supplies and a little more upkeep than usual. 'Twas happy. I felt I accomplished something. Hooray!!

For the thought process action, the thing that started it off was that I saw someone whom I have not seen in quite some time. We've gotten back to that nod 'hello' phase. We haven't had much of any other phase. You're a great concept. This then started me thinking about where the freaking blazes to I do I want to go in certain aspects of my life. I basically said in my head "Ah CRAP!!" [side note: I was listening to the first song on the Weezer Pinkerton album when I saw the above Sandra D] I'm thinking, come fall semester, I think my social scene is going to be messed up. Wow.

Happy note: Eating at the Creamery I ordered my food and the thing is that once the food is ready, the employees call out your name so you can get your product that will soon be consumed by none other than your very self. I had them pronounce my name as "Filpay" instead of "Felipe" because that is the way my supervisor says my name. And she's been my boss for nearly a year and a half now. We all laughed.

03 August 2005

He might be a Hammer fan

"Put a camera to a saw blade and the camera will lose!"--Dr. Jones

So, my apartment has been on this Super Mario Bros. 2 kick for the last littler while. I'll tell you the truth, it's been one of my favorites for a long time. I know the game pretty well forwards and backwards. I should, I've owned it for probably more than 10 years now. Lately, it's the game of choice and I know it's been left on for many hours at a time. A couple of times it's been left on when no one is home so that the person who is playing can start up right where they left off. Yeah, it's craziness.

In the game one can choose one of four different characters to play as. You have your choice between Mario, Luigi, Toad and Princess. My character of choice is the one and only Toad. He's got speed and control. He can pick up anything right quick. Yeah, he's cool. But the question is: why in the name of DreamLand is he wearing white Hammer pants? Toad, you are cooler than I am.

I think since the Mario 2 game Toad and I have developed some sort of bond. I don't think I'm that creepy. But anyway, the thing is that if Toad is a usable character in a game I will more than likely pick Toad [Toad, I choose you? and no I will not link pokémon to this blog, eh...]. He is the character of choice for me. Mario 2, Kart, Kart 64 and probably the rest.

To end this, I have to say the following: I'm a Toad fan, not a Hammer fan. Thank you very much.

02 August 2005

Tampico vs. Anything

"Why do people take life so seriously anyway? It's not like any of us make it out alive."--Zack Callender

"I'll give you two bucks if you finish that," said one John. Yeah, he was referring about 2/3 of a gallon of Tampico juice. I almost did it. Probably could have done it if it wasn't for that mass amounts of ice cream that I just downed. That was a rough night. But I did get my two dollars.

Tampico does a number on the soul. I think it might be the xanthan gum. I don't know. The only thing I know is that my tummy [no wait, gut!! Crap factory!!] starts contorting in weird ways and I feel funky. bleh..... The above experience happened about two years ago. I've only had the stuff twice since. Thanks to Jamie and Uncle Pat. Okay, my eye is twitching just talking about this, I need to stop.

Since the Tampico experience I've move onto other drinks. I went through my Capri Sun phase. Not bad. Right now I'm on that stuff called Sunny Delight. John says it tastes like oil and that it lubricates his insides. Because of that, I now have to say that I'm going to lubricate my bowels every time I get a drink. It's very happy.

John says Tampico and Sunny D are the same. I think not. Tampico makes me twitch and Sunny D does not. There is that very specific difference. Hence!! However, there is discussion of a taste off. Blindfolds will be necessary. I will taste the difference. HA!!! I'm thirsty

31 July 2005

Do I really have any idea what this blog is about?

"Because who in their right mind would live in Kansas?"--Prof. Fellingham

I'm mostly bored right now so whatever shows up on this post is not my fault!! Okay so maybe it is but that's besides the point. And I don't really have anything better to do. I guess I could find some way to harass my arch nemesis but I'm also lazy. Just ask any of the three couches in the living room.

So I don't have a cpu. Dr. Jones lets me use his. I use it mostly to check the emails and blog. Mostly. As I am sitting here, I notice the one flake of french toast cereal on his desk. I don't know exactly how long it's been there. But it has been awhile. I'm almost attached to it. I shouldn't be at all. This is weird.

Star Wars! So I went to the dollar theater twice this weekend. Outside there were these peoples dressed up as Star Wars characters. I think they were professional dresser uppers. Because those costumes were dang cool. My favorites were the Stormtrooper and the Jawa. The jawa was about four feet tall. Man, that was the coolest ever. And the stormtrooper, well, come to think of it, I've had fond memories pretending to be one of thems. Also, I was really tempted to go up to the stormtrooper and say the following, "These are not the droids you are looking for...We may go about our business...Move along." I believe I was really giddy.

Things I have been for Halloween:
a clown
Luigi (brother was Mario)
Jawa
John Travolta
Secret Service

I'm going to trash that french toast flake right now and I can't type worth beans.

29 July 2005

Weapon of choice: Spread

"That's going to kill you every time."--Bro. Skinner

Just got off work this afternoon and I open my apartment door to find Dr. Jones playing Super Contra. Yup, the old 8-bit system still works. He proceeded to look at me and then got hosimified. Twice. Jones then stated that he needed to start over and I said "You clearly need another person to play with you." There was an agreement and we started a new game. Jones always takes the blue pants. I always have the red pants. It can't be any other way. We get confused. We have a system of playing. It's unwritten and it just sort of came about. Man, we're good!! It's the double rapid spread combo. That pretty much destroys everything. We beat the game in about 30 minutes. It was my turn to shine this time around. I don't know how many times we've beat it. The ending's lame. But we love it nonetheless.

Like many of the old Nintendo games, we have no idea what the story line is. Contra starts out like many other war type-ish games. Then it gets absolutely weird. Nothing is explained during gameplay. You just run around shooting everything in sight. The story line is always in the instruction booklet. At least back then they were. Take a look at Metroid and the Legend of Zelda. You just killed things. Anything. Plus, you probably didn't even know the names of the things you were killing. Possibly the end bosses like Ridley, Kraid and Ganon. And they gave you power-ups, 1-ups, energy tank-ups and all kinds of flashy things. It was beautiful.

The great thing was, that you could beat many of these games within two hours. The original Zelda. I timed myself at an hour and 20 minutes. Not bad if I say so myself. Can you do that nowadays? I thought not. What the I must waste 70 hours of my life getting every single item and doing every little sub-story line? Eh.... I swear that those games keep time solely for the purpose of showing you how much of loser you are. [I will say that I am that big of a loser when it comes to the Zelda games, CRAP!!]

Another sign that I am a loser is the fact that I have many of the theme musics memorized. Like unto Mario's 1 and 2, Legend of Zelda, MegaMan, possibly even Bubble Bobble along with many others. I believe I can whistle or doot-do any of them. Yes, I am old school.

27 July 2005

Dang! I have a girlfriend

"You cultural imperialists!!"--Dr. Jones

Wednesday, May 2nd of 2001, La Grande, Oregon. I find myself going to institute. I see a bunch of good friends that I haven't seen in awhile due to the fact that they've been away to college. Lesson is over and treats are served. While eating some cake and ice cream [always such a good combo] I end up talking to my good friend Ori Waite and she introduces me to one Amethyst Freeman. I dropped some ice cream next to the foot of said Amethyst and not too long afterward I head home slightly blushing.

Friday, May 4th of said 2001, Ori's house. I'm invited to a somewhat large get together at the Waites house. The usuals show up. Aria, Candace, Pam, Blaine, Amethyst and a few others including myself. We try a bonfire in the backyard. That happened to be a fiasco. However, during that time I got to talking to that one Amethyst. The conversation is quite good and lo and behold, we hit it off. So, by the end of the night, we get to holding hands. Everyone goes home. I'm a bit unsure what to think right now.

Sunday, May 6th once again in the year of 2001, Stake Conference. Talks were good. We heard from the local Mission President. I see Amethyst a little bit during. After the meeting, Amethyst and I hug, say a few things and we're off in our seperate ways. She's cute.

Wednesday, May 9th of the very same 2001, Provo, Utah. Having been set apart as a missionary the previous Sunday, I enter the MTC where I plan on learning spanish and spending nearly two years in southeast Mexico preaching the good word. Basic rule for the missionaries: girls no touchie!! Amehtyst and I write consistantly for two months. I find out her last name during this time. We have one fight. Through letters, yes that is possible, let me tell you!!

During the next year and about one half there were many letters and e-mails. We both found out a whole heap about one another. And I must say some of those letters made me blush [somewhat a lot]. I liked her and she liked me. Plus, that package was beautiful! I didn't know so many sweets could fit into that size container.

About August of the year 2002 the letters and emails stop coming. For some reason I didn't mind so much. Probably because I didn't know said Amethyst all that well having met her on three different occasions. Then follows January of 2003 in which I get the infamed "Dear John" letter where Amethyst tells me that she is getting hitchimified 11 days before I return to ye United States of America. She also tells me that it was okay if we still wrote to each other. I guess I was okay with that.

Not too long after the "Dear John" letter I emailed her and asked if I burn her letters and pictures for "traditions sake". Many of the missionaries often do this after they get dumped. I just wanted her permission to do so. I didn't get an email or letter back. So, I took my liberties. However, looking back, I wish I hadn't burnt them. Because they would have made great conversation pieces and also to see how mushy they were. Ah crap!! Well, everyone their own story.

25 July 2005

You said this

"Ray, the sponges migrated about a foot and a half."--Dr. Venkman, Ghostbusters

Sometimes, I kind of hear. I think a lot of people do that. Some peoples more often than others but whatever is just fine. *wink and thumbs up* Also there are those times when you try to say something but two thoughts or words come out at the same time and you get an order of phonemes that has yet to have ever been auscultated. Also, people sometimes mispronounce things and that often makes for good times indeed. Where I'm at, this creation of new phonematical orders will often find their way into everyday conversation. And my roommate [being a linguistics major] will probably have my head for even coming up with the word "phonematical". At least I understand what I'm getting at.

Classic example in one Homestarrunner shindig. The word "grood". Teen Girl Squad #4 will work. And now for examples from my personal happenstances. First off, the word "stacy". It means thus following: really, really tasty. Why? Do you ask? Story: I was eating food and Dr. Jones asked me how my food was and I said "Tasty" but he heard "stacy" and hence, new term, and we use it. Middle finger, the word and/or concept "E-cuddle". Someone was talking about their Economy class and said "ECON" and clearly I misheard what they said and the concept of E-cuddling came about. In fact, I don't even want to define E-cuddling. I'll let your imagination wander or something like that. C, the word "Screepy". It's a cross between scary and creepy. A combination of both.

I know that there's more out there but as of right now I'm just trying to correct m spelling errors while typing. Defibe? I don't know.

23 July 2005

Arch Nemesismanship

"Alright you primitive screw-heads, listen up!!"--Ash, Army of Darkness

I forgot how funny Army of Darkness was. So many quotable lines. Humor vs. Horror and Humor won. So, that movie was viewed last night at my Arch Nemesis' apartment. The night was spent venting about work, the screepy people there, cling-ons, heckling those listed above, each other and discussing an assortment of other topics like Harry Potter, blogs and the man on the motorcycle with the sexy neck and eyes. You get the idea.

First off, 'twas so nice to just to get out of my apartment and do something, anything, not there. I was at the HQ of my arch nemesis. I mean, what better way to spend the evening? Watching movies, discussing, heckling and commentating who knows what the good goosin' heck!!

One of the topics discussed was about titles. Everyone has a title to someone else whether it be friend, passing acquaintances, Sandra D. or whatever else. I've modestly earned my title as an arch nemesis. I'm okay with that. She's mine. She claims to be good. I claim neither good nor evil. This whole let's be enemies is just between us two. And it's good fun.

What was especially fun was that I learned of some of her weaknesses. Ooh, this is great!! I could tell everyone what they are but, seeing as we are arch enemies to each other and no one else, it wouldn't be right of me to spread the word. It's some sort of unwritten code or something like that and I don't want her to have the desire to destroy my soul. She's allowed to destroy my ego but I'm rather fond of whatever is left of my soul. Besides that, I enjoy the fun we poke at each other. I have to keep her around just for that. But at least I found a weakness. Well, she told it to me straight up. Anyway, she got the 1-up on me on other stuff. She's better at the slander and can cut me down like nobody's business. So, we're even. And besides, we have to have a reason to keep up our title. Ha ha!!

21 July 2005

Crap hits the fan

"I am vindicated, I am selfish, I am wrong,
I am right I swear I'm right,
Swear I knew it all along,
And I am flawed,
but I am cleaning up so well,
I am seeing in me now,
the things you swore you saw yourself."
--Vindicated, Dashboard Confessional

I hoped for a lot this week. I wanted so much. And yet again, the world has turned and left me here. I believe I have good intentions. I try hard when I find something I want. I am able to focus. Sure I'm not perfect but I'll take a good stab at it. Am I hoping for the wrong things? Should I have my focus elsewhere? What do I give in to? What do I resist? Why does everything have to come down all at once? I'm tired of this crap. I just want to slip away and just have the leaves in North Carolina just bury me! Bury Me!! I don't want to do your sleepwalk dance anymore, I just want to go to Summerland. Why is it that when I come to the rescue I get left behind? I can hear them talking in the real world but they don't understand. Don't fall down now you will never get up.

I want to be saved.

19 July 2005

I have two brains

"We stayed at home to write, to consolidate our outstretched selves."--Sylvia Plath

Brain number one is located in my head. It's supposed to process any and all information it collects. It has its good days and its bad. Brain number two is on paper. I write. It's for recollection. It keeps track of everything. Storage space is purchased from the Moleskine Co. Somehow for me, this works.

Only I have to understand

"Sometimes the most real things are the things you can't see."--Tom Hanks, Polar Express

My experiences are my own. I have my own reasoning. The fact of the matter is that I will do my own thing and follow my own path. What I do and how I feel depend completely on the way I view things. And at times like these I don't think I'll ever be able to explain things so that others will see exactly what I see. That does not matter to me though. What does matter is that I do what I feel is right. I respect those who do likewise. I cannot ask for more.